A Woman’s Despair

Image Credits: R Prasad

 

“A hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world”. Does it? I was always told that you are a woman and you have the magic to bring life to this world. I was captivated and thought myself to be magical only until I grew up. The reality is far worse than what I thought to be magical. I am a woman, and I am scared. Scared of men, may it be strangers or friends; Scared of society where being a woman is looked down upon, raped, molested, teased, tortured or killed; Scared of the government and the police who once I thought help the nation grow, but no! They are too much into how to increase their bank balance! I am scared to get out of my own house, but wait, am I safe in my own house? where my husband beats me up, where my in-laws taunts me every day that I could not fetch their son a good price, where I am considered to be a burden on my own family. I am scared to step out when the night falls, I am scared to go to the college everyday where I am teased and commented upon, I am scared to send my daughter to school, praying each moment for her safety, I am scared to wear my favorite red skirt, I am scared to hang out with my friends to any club, I am scared to ride any autos where autowalas would check their mirrors every now and then and look at me with their dirty eyes, I am scared to travel in any vehicle with tinted black glass; I AM SCARED OF BEING A WOMAN. 

India where I am compared to goddesses is trodden down in this male dominant society. It has become a nation where I am neither safe inside womb nor outside. I do not wish to be treated as goddess but rather I wish to be treated as equal. 29 December 2012 should be marked on the calendars as the National Shame Day. A nation which has failed to keep its daughters, mothers, sisters safe in a country which itself is regarded as “Bharat Mata” (Mother India). YES, I live in a society which the man has woven, with his thoughts and practices; the same society where my own father would kill me before even I am born, and even if by slightest chances I live, I am molested and raped, thrown acid on my face, burnt alive, punched every night by my drunken husband. The same society that will ensure that my life is not worth of existence after rape or even if I want a divorce. If I am raped, the people will pity on me while others will tell me that my life is over as I can never lead a normal life. WHY? Why do I fear of the rules that the man has made for his own sake, to save his own ass. It’s the same society that cannot protect me, then WHY it is the first one to blame me? What have I done wrong? Is it my fault that I had to go home late because I was busy working? Is it because my father could not arrange dowry for my wedding? Is it my fault that I do not love you and rejected your proposal and you throw acid on my face? Is it my fault that I cannot go and hang out with my friends because I am a woman, OR is it my fault that your testosterone can trigger anytime? WHY being a woman, I am always treated as an object to fuck and showed that a man is powerful than me? WHY do people forget that I am a human being too, then WHY should I be treated like animals? WHY should I be tortured to death? Down the ages, my faith has been crushed because the man has let me down. The man who has tortured me and the society which could not protect me. The society needs to learn that a man and a woman cannot function without each other. I am equally important. The man needs to learn that there is no competition between sexes and that he can take out his frustration on me physically. He needs to learn self respect and respect for me.

The “present” is a result of an impotent society. The society needs to be changed. The people need to be changed. “Charity begins at home”, instead of preaching me how to dress up or telling that I myself am the reason to be raped or tortured, PREACH YOUR SONS how women should be treated and respected, because even if I am walking the street naked, NO MAN HAS THE RIGHT TO RAPE ME! Rape is NOT SEX, rape is ruthless and cruel and there is no pleasure in brutalizing me. I indicate not only the culprits, but also to those who watch me teased and molest, they are equally pathetic and guilty. You think you know what I go through and how I feel when I am mentally and physically harassed? I don’t think so, because if you did I would not have been repeatedly harassed historically.

Damini/Amanat/Nirbhaya or whatever my real name is does NOT matter; I AM A WOMAN and I died because the society failed me, the nation failed me, the people failed me and I did not deserve to be raped and brutally tortured. I died, my sufferings ended, but yours has just begun. Before you are left in a nation without women, STAND BESIDE ME. FIGHT FOR MY DIGNITY. Protect me; I could be your daughter, sister or your mother. Rather than accusing me, I need to be listened, heard and reached out. I do not want to be scared anymore. I want to live in a nation where my head is held high. As Mahatma Gandhi quoted, “Be the change you wish to see in the world”.

It’s Time. ACT NOW.